My theme for 2023: Rooting my Touch Tree

One of the defining reads of 2022 was Glennon Doyle’s Untamed. It was so defining that I read it 3 times at different times in the year. This book is the perfect illustration of a meme-like poster that does the rounds on Instagram stating that I should read books that had a profound effect on…

Wishbone

I don’t like wearing my wishbone where my backbone should be. It makes no sense. I like sense. I do wish though. Not often. But, I do. The human condition seems inescapable in some ways. I wish for appreciation without possession. For space and closeness. For security without a lock and key. For safety without…

2022. My Year of Yes

Those who have stayed with me on my nomadic move from blog to blog over the last 10 or 12 years know that every December I take stock. I work out my theme for the new year and I reflect on the year gone by. 2022 was not perfect but Good God in heaven, it…

Butterfly

There is what we want and there is what we get. I want my transformation (my connection with myself) to be glorious, beautiful, and easy. I imagine a butterfly emerged from its cocoon; flying off into the sunset. Free, beautiful, above it all and never hungry again. The thing is, that first flight is not…

I write from my scars

If you sensor the story, you will never know what it was meant to be Danny Shapiro I write from my scars. I don’t recall ever writing anything sensible from a bleeding wound. One of the gifts of healing is the ability to write about the experience of pain clearly, authentically and coherently. The ability…

Red Flag

Red flag? What red flag? The one flapping in front of my face? Oh, I see. I see how you could be confused. It’s where you are standing. If you move right to where I am, you’ll see. You’ll see that it’s more cherry than red. In the right light, it’s almost fuschia. I will…

Words

Sometimes the words rattle around loudly in my head. They are in no particular order. Just many. I’m overwhelmed. They want me to write them. How can I, when I can’t follow or keep up sometimes? I’m confused. What do you want me to say? I’m frustrated. If you won’t be clear, be quiet. I…

I am out with lanterns looking for myself

“I took at the time, a memorandum of my several senses, and also of my hat and coat, and my best shoes – but it was lost in a melee, and I’m out with lanterns looking for myself.” Emily Dickinson I want to find myself, my 5 year old self said. Why don’t you go…

Everybody needs toilet paper

I write lots of notes to myself. I capture fleeting thoughts that make an impression on me on whatever is nearest: note paper, journal, receipts, my phone… everything. Often, I then forget about them. The one thing I do consistently is I date them. I will come across random thoughts that are years old from…

I didn’t fall out of love

I didn’t fall out of love. Not with you. It wasn’t sudden. It happened one cruel word at a time. One cold gesture at a time. One unkindness at a time. One exclusion at a time. One piece of mean “sarcasm” at a time. One lie at a time. One day… at a time. It…